March 3, 2010

Are you dragging around excess baggage? Is it getting in the way of running the daily writing race set before you?

Is there “stuff” taking up space in your life that you need to dump overboard so you can pick up some speed?

Jumping Off!

I’ve been struggling with this issue lately, and it reminded me of a period in our country’s history. Each spring from 1841-1861 Independence, Missouri, was crowded with thousands of emigrants preparing for the 2170-mile trek we now call the Oregon Trail.

Here merchants competed for the opportunity to furnish emigrants with supplies and equipment for their journey west. A family of four would need over a thousand pounds of food to sustain them on the five-month trip to Oregon. Most emigrants loaded their covered wagons to the brim with food, farm implements, and furniture. 

The journey began, but within a few miles most emigrants realized they had overloaded their wagons. Unless their loads were lightened, they would never be able to make the arduous journey across the plains. Their only choice–if they wanted to go the distance–was to start throwing things out.

How About You?

Do you identify with these emigrants? Have you overloaded YOUR wagon? Are there things (activities, hobbies, interests, bad habits) that you need to dump if you’re going to make a successful journey as a writer?

Remember, those pioneers weren’t throwing out things that didn’t matter. They were giving up precious possessions in order to fulfill their dreams. What have you given up for your writing? [This topic has been on my mind lately because two weeks ago I made a very difficult decision to bow out of my long-running weekly critique group. I needed more time to write, and I couldn't find it any other way. I am still in withdrawal.]

Fulfilling our dreams requires sacrifice. What have you had to “toss overboard” in order to devote some time to your writing? What was the easiest to let go of? What was hardest? Take a moment and share!

February 15, 2010

I spent much of last week sick in bed, but it gave me a chance to read more than usual. I got a couple of “aha!” moments from the book I was reading (Who Switched Off My Brain?) mentioned last week.

The book deals with what the author calls “the Dirty Dozen” areas in our lives where we create our own problems, often by well-meaning efforts. This toxic behavior can derail our purpose in life and steal our dreams–including our writing dreams.

Two of the dirty dozen that hit me between the eyes was “toxic seriousness” and “toxic schedules.” And I knew that I’d stumbled across two of the reasons I was sick instead of fighting off common viruses.

AHA! #1

I’ve known for years that negative emotions like anger and unforgiveness can literally make you physically sick. But did you know that an absence of fun in your life can make you sick too?

Laughter IS the Best medicine!

For a lot of reasons, I grew up with the firmly entrenched idea that “life is a serious matter.” People who didn’t take life seriously annoyed me. I thought they simply didn’t understand the situation!

Well sometimes life is no laughing matter, but you still need to incorporate more fun in your life. [I finally understood why I felt so much better physically after spending time with my grandkids, despite being tired. I laugh a lot more on those days!]

Did you know this? Studies show that “a really good belly laugh can make cortisol drop by 39% and adrenalin by 70%, while the ‘feel-good hormone,’ endorphin, increases by 29%…Laughter boosts your immune system by increasing immunity levels and disease-figthing cells.”

Another medical study showed that humor gets both sides of your brain working together, which is so necessary to writers. We need to be both creative and editor-minded (left-brained and right-brained) in order to do our best writing.

So take time to bring fun into your life today–and every day. Look for the humor in situations–or even yourself. Watch a funny video. Read something that tickles your funny bone. Tell a joke!

AHA! #2

In my case, I realized over the weekend that my “toxic seriousness” went hand-in-hand with what the author called “toxic schedules.” One had a direct impact on the other. My overly serious attitude about life leads to an over-scheduled week that doesn’t work unless I invent a 48-hour day. And, of course, a packed schedule adds pressure and just reinforces an overly serious attitude.

Current brain research shows that there’s a lot more at risk than just being tired when you over-schedule yourself. Of particular interest to writers, without sufficient relaxation in your lifestyle, “you will become a less effective thinker, defeating your ability to accomplish the mental tasks that stole our relaxation in the first place. In fact, for the brain to function like it should, it needs regroup/consolidation time. If it doesn’t get this, it will send out signals in the form of high-level stress hormones, some of which are epinephrine, norepinephine and cortisol. If these chemicals constantly flow, they create a ‘white noise’ that increases anxiety and blocks clear thinking and the processing of information.”

To put it another way, relaxation is NOT a waste of your time. You’re doing your brain–and all of your writing processes–a big favor.

Live–and LEARN

So how did that impact my weekend? I spent Saturday with my grandkids (ages 4 and 7), guaranteed to produce the belly laughs I needed. And I took off Sunday with my husband to visit some family, go to a movie, window shop a bit, and eat out. I slept like a rock last night and feel like a million bucks today.

And now to make this a guilt-free habit!

February 1, 2010

When it comes to your writing, do you ever have a crisis of confidence?

It can come from a number of things: destructive (instead of constructive) criticism in your critique group, months and years of rejections (from editors and/or agents), poor reviews or sales when you finally get published, and put-downs from family or friends about your “little hobby.” 

My writing friend, Sherryl, has been sending me her notes on a new goals book she’s reading, and one line in particular struck me this week. It said, “Courage and confidence come from knowledge and skills-the more you develop knowledge and skills, the more courage and confidence you’ll have.” I mulled that over, applying it to my writing, and realized that was exactly what had happened to me in January as a side benefit to working harder.

 Buckling Down

Some months back I talked about a self-study writing program that my friend and I had designed and embarked on because we didn’t have the funds to enroll in any of the MFA programs. The study time included a lot more writing and critiquing, plus analyzing middle grade novels (mostly Newbery books), plus studying writing craft books. In January I created an Excel spreadsheet to track my hours in each category, using my trusty kitchen timer. I only counted the actual hours spent writing or studying. (I did not count any hours spent blogging or teaching or at my critique group.)

I didn’t meet my goal of 25 study hours per week. In fact, I only logged 65.5 hours total toward my monthly goal instead of 100 hours. (This was the amount of time that a large number of MFA graduates told me they spent studying when in the Vermont MFA program.) While I didn’t meet my January goal, I was very pleased to have added a significant number of hours of work.

Results

My critique group commented that my writing improved a lot during the month. In addition, at the end of the month, I finally took five hours to research some publishers for a finished book manuscript sitting on my desk for the last six months. Suddenly, after a month of solidly working on increasing my knowledge and my skills, I felt like doing it. Like Sherryl’s quote, I finally had the “courage and confidence” necessary to submit the manuscript.

Over two years ago, I was privileged to attend Jane Yolen’s master novel writing retreat. I still remember her words to us after she’d read and critiqued our manuscripts. She looked around the circle of a dozen writers and said, “Some of you in here are better writers than I am.” She paused while we choked, then added, “But I can guarantee you that none of you write as much as I do.”

At the time, I thought she was telling us that she was much published because she wrote a lot of hours every week. Made sense! Now I wonder if she was actually telling us that writing so many hours was what had honed her skills and knowledge of the language and gave her the courage and confidence to keep submitting things.

Don’t Major on the Minors

The point of all this rambling? If you lack courage and confidence about your writing, I’m beginning to think that the best thing you can do for that is to just write more. A lot more. And study to improve your skills. Sometimes I think we spend too much time analyzing our fears as a way to bolster our courage.

Maybe-just maybe-the problem would take care of itself if we just planted our seats in our seats and wrote more.

January 27, 2010

All of our actions have results, or consequences. That’s not news to anyone. And yet, do we act like we believe that?

Not all that often.

Too many writers (myself included sometimes) believe that if we work our hardest and try our best and keep a good attitude, we’ll end up successfully published. Why? Because we have good intentions. But it’s “direction-not intention-that determines our destination,” says Andy Stanley in his new book The Principle of the Path.

Here’s a simple illustration. You may intend to be a great archer. However, if you work hard, shoot arrow after arrow, and lift weights to have stronger biceps-but don’t pay attention to direction-shooting arrows is a waste of your time. Oh, you might luck out and hit your target once in a blue moon, but that’s about it. Sadly, many writers approach their careers like this.

Good Intentions-No Direction

In every part of your life (health, relationships, writing career) you’re moving in some direction toward a specific destination. We don’t end up at that destination out of luck or sheer hard work or good intentions or because “it all worked out somehow.” Destination is the end result of the choices you made yesterday, added to the ones you make today, added to the ones you make tomorrow.

There are paths we choose that lead us to destinations we never intended, and there are paths we’re on right now that are leading us away from-not toward-our dreams and goals. If we’re headed in the wrong direction, no matter how good our intentions or how hard we work, we won’t reach our goal.

Personally Speaking

It’s the decisions you make on a daily basis that determine your path and your destination. For example, for many reasons I want to be super-healthy the older I get. I want it more than most other things because it affects all areas of my life. I know a lot about nutrition and exercise and weight loss and what my body needs to run its best. A healthy body is my intention and has been for years.

BUT the daily decisions I made last year to eat candy instead of the hated vegetables, to watch a movie instead of go running, and skip the weights work-outs have NOT led me to great health in 2010. My path led to higher cholesterol, higher blood pressure, much less stamina, and more headaches. (I bet you can guess what my goals are this year!)

Writerly Direction Needed Too

I see writers doing the same thing. They’ve got their goals written down, they’ve set deadlines for themselves, they’re determined to finish that novel and submit it, and ultimately they want to be published. They knock themselves out to create websites, network on Facebook and LinkedIn and writer chat rooms, write newsletters and blogs-but they never have time to actually do much writing. They spend so little time actually writing that they don’t improve.

Despite their great intentions, their daily choices are not taking them in the direction they want to go. (That’s my main reason for staying off the Internet till the afternoon, as mentioned in my Not-to-Do List. It diverts me from the path I want to take.)

“I know it’s tempting to believe that our good intentions, aspirations and dreams somehow have the ability to do an end run around the decisions we make on a daily basis,” says Andy. “But at the end of the day, the principle of the path determines the outcome. Simply put, you and I will win or lose in life by the paths we choose.”

What path will you choose today?

January 25, 2010

It’s not so easy to put first things first. It’s not even easy to decide what should be first!

I want to write first in my day because so many writer bios of famous successful authors say that’s what they do. They stumble to their offices first thing, in their slippers and carrying coffee, to pound the keys for a couple of hours before breakfast. I’ve always wanted to write first.

Not Always Possible

For many years, early rising babies and children clamored for my attention first thing every morning, and let’s face it, hungry kids and soaked diapers won’t wait a couple of hours. Even after the kids were older and there was just the dog, he had to go outside very quickly every morning. Waiting two hours for that “first” would have also been disastrous.

So many things vie for first place in your day! Some health gurus say exercise first because you’ll never do it later, and it’s critical to your wellbeing and stamina. Others say eat a healthy breakfast first. Still others say you must journal first and dump whatever is bothering you where no one will ever see. If you’re an e-mail junkie, you may feel checking that must be first since something there might affect the course of your day. Your pastor will suggest that devotional time needs to be first or it will be pushed aside when you get busy. There are calls to make and showers to take. They all “need” to be first in your day before you lose control of your time.

Calgon, Take Me Away!

Enter Decidophopia. It’s a term I read in Carol Rottman’s writers in the Spirit. Here’s how she describes it: “Every morning from those early stirrings in bed of sluggish body and scattered mind, I must make some choices. What first? What next?…As I face my desk each day, I know I’ve got [Decidophopia]. I must decide, but I am afraid. To make one thing first pushes everything else lower on the list. My desk is usually covered with notebooks and loose paper in stacks-each one a ’should.’”

Do you have Decidophopia? When my children were small, I didn’t have. There were few choices. The kids’ needs came first. The writing stuff came later-often much later when they were down for naps. Years down the road, when the kids were in school and then grown, Decidophopia set in. Suddenly I had some choices. Even with teaching part-time, I could schedule most of my days however I wanted.

Choices! Choices!

I learned fairly quickly that I love structure. “Going with the flow” every day just fed my Decidophopia and made it worse. Making that “what next?” decision every hour or so resulted too many times in cruising on out to the kitchen for a snack or reading e-mail. As boring as it may sound to many people, I now have a written list for my important daily stuff. I like order.

My devotional time comes first. My exercise comes next if the weather is decent enough-otherwise it comes at noon. My shower and healthy breakfast are next. And the writing comes next. (I use a timer, and every half hour I take a five-minute yoga break for my neck and back, followed by a short break away from the desk.) Then it’s back to writing for thirty minutes.

The writing periods in the morning are actual writing on a novel. The afternoon writing periods might be studying market guides or making submissions or doing a bit of online marketing. (I write these blogs on Saturday, load them on the blog to post without me on M-W-F mornings, and that allows me to stay off the Internet till afternoon.)

No One Right Way

What’s your routine like? Or do you have one? Are there so many “important firsts” vying for your attention each day that it’s hard to get started? Are you able to be flexible and “go with the flow,” or do you need more structure?

I love hearing how other writers work-we’re all so different and there’s certainly no “one right way.” Leave a comment about how you handle decidophopia!

January 20, 2010

As one of my time-saving endeavors in 2010, I made what my best friend calls a Not-to-Do list. I couldn’t squeeze more writing into my day unless I eliminated some things. Once I identified many of the problems, fixing them wasn’t that hard!

And a Not-to-Do list really works too. The first week in January I was able to add 16 hours of writing time to my schedule, and the second week I added 15 hours. I was thrilled with the changes—and believe it or not, I’m finished earlier in the day and able to take all of Sunday off.

I’ll share my list, and then I hope you’ll leave a comment and share something you’ve given up to make more time for writing. Altogether, we could generate a really helpful list! 

The List

Since what you don’t do often determines what you can do, let the weeding out process begin!

1.      I use my answering machine and don’t take calls from numbers I don’t recognize. I let it go to Voicemail on my answering machine, which is turned up so I can hear the message. If it’s important, I can interrupt the message and take it. Nine times out of ten—or more—it can wait.

2.      I don’t get on the Internet at all until 2 p.m. This has been the single most beneficial change I’ve made this year. I let my kids and friends know my new schedule and said to call me if they needed an answer about something before that time. If I answer email before that, I’m stuck online for several hours, flitting from site to site.

3.       I don’t email after supper anymore. Again, it’s because it expands until that “ten-minute check” has eaten up an hour or two. It robs me of sleep I need, plus relaxed reading time that helps me unwind.

4.      I no longer agree to appointments and meetings in the mornings. That ruins my writing for the whole day, for some reason. So far, I’ve never had trouble getting the time changed to the afternoon, and as late as possible.

5.      I now just check email twice a day, at 2 p.m. and just before I quit work about 6 p.m. Since I’m starving by 6, there’s no temptation to linger and read all the email ads I get for losing weight.

6.      If I don’t know, I say so. I can’t tell you how much time this has saved me already this year! I probably have an ego problem, but when someone emails and wants to know how to do XX, and I have no experience with it, my past behavior has always been to Google for the answer, send a lengthy reply, and give the person lots of URLs to check out. Now, if I don’t know, I say so. I apologize for not being able to help, but that’s it. I now let people Google things for themselves.

7.      I have a simple cell phone. I just got a new cell phone because my old one broke. Call me a fuddy-duddy, but I didn’t buy one with any bells and whistles. I don’t want to be able to get online or check email by phone. I want it mostly for emergencies—mine. I no longer carry it around everywhere either. I leave it in my purse for emergencies on the road.

8.      I’m declining parties and showers for people I barely know.

It’s good to focus on getting things done, but sometimes you can’t get more organized until you weed out the time-eaters in your life. So now, let me ask: what things are going on your not-to-do list this year? Please share!

January 8, 2010

Shocking but true–you need stress in your life in order to grow and in order to attain your goals. Sound weird? It did to me too until I understood the two types of stress.

Distress? Or Eustress?

We all know what bad stress is (or distress). It’s the rejection letter (like the one I got on Monday), the flu bug you can’t shake, the fight with your teenager over curfew, bad news about the publishing economy, and being stuck in traffic when you’re due in the dental office.

The effects of bad stress are well known now: high blood pressure, inability to sleep, weight gain, sore bodies, heart attacks, snarly relationships, overdrawn bank accounts, and having your rotten teeth fall out (after being stuck one too many times in traffic.)

Healthy Challenges

Eustress, on the the other hand, is good for you. Yes, it is a challenge to your body or mind (or both), but the end result is growth and moving toward your goals (instead of away from them.) Eustress might come in the form of a trainer or coach pushing you to stretch your limits, or choosing to study something at night instead of watch TV, or going to counseling with your spouse. Remember, eustress is stress that is healthful and helps you grow in some area.

In many of the choices you make every day, it’s a choice between distress and eustress. The one BIG difference I’ve noticed is that distress tends to overtake you and fall on you without you needing to make any effort at all, while you have to actually choose eustress.

How Much is Too Much?

Can you have too much eustress? We all want to attain our goals and make progress as quickly as possible. Is eustress always a case of “more is better”? No, it’s not. If you’re out of shape, taking a walk each day, and building up the miles over time, is good for you: eustress. Running a 5K race after you’ve done nothing but watch TV for ten years is bad for you: distress.

The same goes for your writing. If the most you’ve ever written is thirty minutes per day, then aiming for 1-2 hours per day would be eustress (good). Deciding to write 8-10 hours per day, on the other hand, would usually cause distress (to both mind and body).

Writer Eustress

For years, I did my best to avoid criticism in all forms, including critiques. I had a very thin skin and couldn’t handle it. It caused me distress. But it wasn’t until an editor at a workshop practically forced me to read my story in a group–and learn to handle constructive criticism–that I discovered there were two kinds. Destructive criticism was the kind to avoid where someone rips your writing apart and haughtily calls you names. However, the good criticism could be immensely helpful, even if it was uncomfortable to hear.

Today, I don’t know what I’d do without my critique group, both for writing help and for their friendship. Yes, even a good critique can cause eustress for a while, but it’s a catalyst for growth.  

You Need To Do Both

If you want to achieve your writing goals this year, you will probably need to do two things. First, be aggressive in getting rid of the bad stress in your life. Second, be just as determined to find sources of good stress to challenge yourself to move forward.

Do both things often enough, and it will literally change your life.

January 6, 2010

My biggest goal for 2010 is finding balance in my life.

Last year my health got out balance (no time for self-care) because my volunteer work grew beyond healthy proportions. There wasn’t enough time for my writing, and I found myself emotionally burned out too often.

This year I want to find the balance–and make changes that will support it.

It’s Pretty Simple

One of things I’ve picked up and used from the Simple•ology course I’ve talked about was the importance of two basic questions. Before making each choice of activity–and we make hundreds of choices some days–we are to ask ourselves:

1. Will this action take me toward my goal or away from my goal? 
2. Will this behavior strengthen me or make me weaker?

Every action has a reaction, or consequence, attached to it. Usually there is a positive consequence and a negative one. (Think long-term here.) Before making a choice, just ask yourself those two questions.

Choices, Choices

For example, let’s say your dream is to finish and sell your novel and your goal for today is to write the climax scene. You can choose between two Krispy Kreme donuts for breakfast or a high fiber cereal and fruit. (Think long-term.) A high sugar, low fiber diet will hurt you in many ways, and an important one is your ability to think clearly and have enough stamina to do your writing. One choice weakens you, and one makes you stronger.

Or let’s say your goal today is to send out five queries for the human interest Christmas story you finished. You can read writing blogs, you can research a current market guide for contact information, or you can see what all your Facebook friends did over the weekend. Only one choice will move you a concrete step toward your goal today.

Apply these questions everywhere throughout your day. Will taking time to stretch and do sit-ups before a writing session help you or hurt you? (Hint: you need strong core muscles and a supple neck to survive many hours at the computer.) But while exercise is good, taking three hours to drive downtown to a gym, work out, and go to Starbucks just keeps you from your goal.

BOTH Are Needed

Remember, you want to take actions that do at least one of two things: get you closer to your writing goal and/or make you stronger. If you only focus on behaviors that get you to your goal (but eat junk, never exercise, have a fight every morning with your spouse, and never have any solitude), you won’t be able to continue too long.

On the other hand, if you only focus on behaviors that make your body stronger and healthier (but spend your writing time forwarding emails, reading a hundred Tweets, and watching the latest YouTube offerings), you won’t get very close to your goal at all.

Temptation is Everywhere!

Every time you’re tempted to waste time online or eat a pint of ice cream for lunch or chat with every instant messenger who pops up, you are facing a choice. One choice will weaken you–one will make you stronger. One will help you reach your goal–one will push you back even farther.

It’s your choice. And with every good choice you make, it’s easier to make a positive choice the next time. Each choice you face is a potential step toward your writing goals. Take it!

January 4, 2010

Before making my list of writing goals for 2010, I did some serious evaluating last month to try to discover why I had accomplished so much less than I’d hoped in 2009. I had worked harder and longer hours, doing my best to be efficient.

Even so, I wasn’t effective in many areas where I had set goals. I either failed totally or accomplished just a fraction of what I had intended. Why hadn’t I been effective? I was practically the most efficient person I knew!

They Aren’t the Same!

Effectiveness is doing the things that get you closer to your goals. Efficiency is performing a given task (whether important or not) in the most ecconomical manner possible.

Most of us work hard to be efficient in our lives just to stay on top of ever-lengthening To Do lists. And efficiency is good–when it’s applied to the right things, the important things. It’s absolutely useless if it’s not.

Important vs. Unimportant

How do you decide which tasks are important to moving toward your writing goals? It all depends on what your ultimate goals are. Is your main goal to write books, perhaps even make a living at it? Is your writing goal to land a staff position on a big city newspaper? Do you want to bring your writing skills up several notches in 2010?

Once you know your over-all dreams, then look at your To Do list with a more critical eye. Which things on the list support your goal? Those are the important jobs. Which things–if done later, done quickly, or (gasp!) left undone–wouldn’t affect your goals at all? Those are the unimportant tasks.

Take a Step Back

Sometimes we are so close to our To Do lists that we can’t see the forest for the trees. We don’t see that doing something unimportant really well doesn’t make it important. (I’m an excellent email organizer, for example, with all kinds of folders and tags and categories. I have the most organized unnecessary and unwanted email you ever saw.)

Also, just because a task would require a lot of time to accomplish doesn’t make it important either. (The email query to the editor might take you an hour. Reorganizing your writing closet will take four hours. Only querying will get you that coveted assignment–making it the most important task nine times out of ten.)

Effectiveness Trumps Efficiency

Yes, it’s great to be efficient, but to repeat myself, it’s only helpful when you are being effective. For example, if you want to lose the holiday pounds you added, which supports your goal the best–efficiently organizing your recipe files or going for a power walk?

If you want to finish your first novel, which action supports your goal–tearing articles from your writing magazines to file, or sweating over that first chapter?

Are You Effective–or Just Busy?

You want to make the most of your time available. I don’t know what your “efficient time wasters” are, but you probably do. I’ll be talking more about this in the weeks and months to come as I cast a cold, unrelenting eye on each item on my list–and weed out some activities that look good or that “everyone” says you have to do.

What’s the deciding factor? It’s this: Will it take me closer to my goals in some measurable way? Good! If not, it gets pushed to the bottom of the list. I may get to it later–or never!

January 1, 2010

Because I am going to practice what I preach and go for a long hike today, I decided to post a previous article on recovering your energy. It’s worth repeating, I think.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

In a previous blog on “Managing Your Energy Fully,” I quoted from the book The Power of Full Engagement:

To be an effective energy manager, you need to spend nearly all of your time fully engaged in the high positive energy quadrant or recovering your energy by spending time doing things in the low positive energy quadrant.

Definition of Terms

The low positive energy quadrant consists of doing activities that leave you relaxed, mellow, peaceful, tranquil and serene. For me, that means reading a good book or watching a good movie or spending time with certain people with whom I’m on the same sympathetic wavelength.

For you, such positive-energy producing activities may include fishing, golf, sitting in your porch swing, listening to music, going for a bike ride or stroll, or any number of things. The important point is this: unless you spend sufficient short periods throughout your day in intermitten recovery, you’ll burn out and experience a host of other unpleasant symptoms.

Is It Really That Important?

Yes, if you spend all day writing furiously on your novel, zipping along in your high energy positive quadrant, you’ll produce an amazing amount of work. That day, anyway. Maybe even two days in a row, but that will be it.

By relentlessly spending mental energy without recovery, you’ll be tired, anxious, irritable–and self-doubt will inevitably set in. In a tired state, our stories stink, our ideas sound hackneyed, and our prose deadly dull. At that point, we end up taking off more time from the writing than we would have if we’d made ourselves take those intermittent breaks throughout the writing day.

The Pay-Off

What’s the result of taking those short “low positive energy” recovery breaks? You’ll come back to your work more energized, less ache-y in the neck and back, and more emotionally upbeat.

The emotional component is just as important as your physical energy level! Defusing the bombs of self-doubt and anxiety will help your writing as much as feeling re-energized. And in the end, you’ll write more, not less, by taking the short breaks throughout the day.

Give it a try for a week and see. I think you’ll be amazed.

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