December 16, 2011

We’ve talked about the benefits of writing in flow, in that relaxed timeless state, and we’ve talked about the first key to developing this skill: have a reason to write.

Today let’s look at Key #2: thinking like a writer. These keys are based on Susan Perry’s Writing in Flow.

CHANGE MY THINKING?

We all think like writers already, or we wouldn’t be writing, correct? True enough, but in this series we’re concentrating on developing the ability to write in flow. Do writers who frequently write deeply and easily think differently?

Yes, it appears that they do. They have a certain set of attitudes, based on hundreds of Perry’s interviews. If we study these attitudes and beliefs and incorporate them into our own thinking, we should also be able to write in flow, be more productive, and enjoy the writing more.

WRITER ATTITUDES

This doesn’t mean you need a new personality. Quite the contrary. Be who you are, Perry says. “When you work with what comes naturally to you rather than struggling against it—whether it’s your preference for an uncluttered workspace or your tendency to do the opposite when those little voices in your head suggest that you ought to be answering those letters rather than writing a poem—you can apply your energy to what matters most to you.”

Another attitude, especially with writers in the early years, has to do with spending free time pursuing writing. They may be “troubled by the niggling feeling that taking too much time for their writing is slightly selfish because it’s like stealing time from their family,” Perry says. “If you identify with that second attitude, naturally you might find it more difficult to let go and focus fully when you do sit down to write.”

This attitude is easy to overcome after you are published and making money at your writing. Before that, I found that I got over the guilt when I took my writing time from my own free time activities—my sleep, TV, time with my friends. I gave up my own “extras” instead of taking it from the family, and then I didn’t feel guilty. It’s very hard to relax and write “in flow” when you’re feeling guilty!

RISK TAKING

Relaxing into flow—that essential letting go—can feel risky to certain personality types like mine. I don’t like risks, and I spend too much time probably trying to avoid risks. I would love it if I could make all my loved ones stop taking risks too! However, being afraid to take risks in your writing can stifle you as a writer.

“Taking risks, of whatever kind, can be especially challenging to those who can’t bear to give up control,” Perry says. “You can learn to open yourself to the unexpected, which is such a rich source of creative insight, by giving up control in small ways.” Remember, we’re talking about taking risks in your writing. You can certainly still control all the things in your environment that help you get into the flow state: clean desk, soft music, set daily routines, writing in certain locations, whatever you need.

For many writers, taking risks with your writing—in subject matter, in tone—can be scary. What will XXX think? (XXX = your editor, your mother, your spouse, the critics…) If you are focused on the fear of taking risks and what others will think, you can’t relax enough to enter the flow state.

One day I realized that in order to avoid that feeling, I only had to promise myself never to show the story to anyone if I didn’t want to. It never had to see the light of day, never had to offend anyone or hurt someone’s feelings. That decision helped me to write freely. And when I’d get to a place in the story that set off internal alarm bells (“You can’t say that!”), I said to myself (out loud), “No one ever needs to see this. I can say what I want. I can always change it later if I want to.” Writing this way, there is no risk involved whatsoever—and you can’t fail.

BE FULLY ABSORBED

Being fully absorbed in your work is very close to working in flow. And it’s a decision you can choose to make more often. Being fully absorbed means you “are deeply immersed in some activity as to be impervious to distractions…As a personality trait, absorption reflects the degree of your tendency to become deeply engaged in movies, nature, past events, fantasy or anything else.”

This type of person will have an easier time entering the flow state, which requires an ability to become deeply engaged and weed out distractions. A fully absorbed person can watch a good movie or read a good book and forget (temporarily) about negative distractions like his hunger, his headache, and her fight with her spouse—or lovely distractions like the phone, a beautiful day outside, or the cake in the kitchen.

BECOME CONFIDENT

You don’t start out writing with confidence or the ability to bounce back from rejection. You will need to find ways to master your fears, find confidence in your own writing voice, plus deal with isolation and self-doubt. All writers have to do this. I wrote many years with no confidence whatsoever. It can be done, but it’s rather torturous. I wasn’t writing in the enjoyable, timeless flow we’re talking about.

If you want help in this area, I highly recommend Cecil Murphey’s new book called Unleash the Writer Within: the Essential Writers’ Companion. Rather than working to overcome your weaknesses, the author shows you how to make friends with them and turn them into strengths. He deals with helping you find your real voice, like yourself, deal with the inner critic in an usual way, shatter writer’s block, and more. And he does all this in such a kind, straightforward and transparent way. Cec Murphey has millions of books in print and speaks from experience.

LONG-TERM PREPARATION FOR WRITING

If you have several attitudes mentioned above that need adjusting, you can’t just sit down and decide to think like a writer right now, so you can slip into flow. It takes time, depending on your mental attitudes at this time.

Developing the above attitudes will help you tolerate anxiety, be more open to new experiences, and learn to trust the writer you already are. If you feel like you need help in this area of “writerly attitudes that benefit you,” Unleash the Writer Within is my suggestion for you. I wish I’d had this book thirty years ago.

I’ve given you a lot to think about this week on the subject of writing in flow. Next week we’ll begin with Key #3: Loosen Up!

 

November 16, 2011

Grab a cup of coffee or hot chocolate and give yourself permission to read something uplifting and helpful for fifteen minutes. Here’s a variety of posts, covering several subjects dear to the creative heart. Enjoy!

How to Avoid the Power of the Drift talks about the value of planning your life–and the dangers of NOT planning. You won’t “drift” into the writing life of your dreams.

Why We Need Pain to Write is a thought-provoking article from The Writer Magazine online. Pain–yours or others’–is often the catalyst to great writing.

The Week Three Pep Talk from NaNoWriMo by Deb Olin Unferth is full of great practical tips on how to keep going on your novel.

Ten Timeless Books for An Organized Mind gives you a great selection of books on getting organized and getting the writing done. (I already own #3, #5, #6, and #8. I just ordered #4 to learn how to de-clutter my mind!)

Procrastination is an artist’s site, but the issue concerns all creative pursuits. It ends with a great one-minute video showing procrastination in all its glory.

Enjoy!

November 14, 2011

I’ve noticed one amazing thing about myself and other writers who claim to want to write more than anything else. Something odd takes over, and we fill the free time of our lives with all kinds of non-writing activities. We reach for things that make us feel good, that quell any anxiety we might be feeling, or at least keep us occupied.

What fills our lives–what quells our anxiety–can be either positive or negative. The activity we choose can be either a pacifier or a catalyst.

What’s the Outcome?

Activities that fall under the heading of “pacifiers” are things like mindless TV viewing, complaining about the sad state of publishing to all your writing friends, eating mass amounts of comfort food, surfing the Net, playing video games, or shopping till you drop.

Nothing good (for your writing career) comes from any of those activities. They serve simply as pacifiers, something to make the whining, fretful baby in us be quiet. But are we then any closer to our writing goals? No, not at all. We’ve simply passed some time–writing time that we can’t get back.

Positive Time Fillers

What if you’re tired of your non-writing rut, but you can’t seem to crawl out of it either? What can you fill your free time with instead of a pacifier activity? Why not try a catalyst instead? A catalyst is a springboard for change, something that nudges you in a better direction. The next time you feel anxious about your writing and you want to fill your time with something to soothe the fear, why not try a positive change agent?

Activities that fall into the catalyst category might include:

• watching an inspiring movie about an “overcomer”
• spending time with a writing mentor or coach
• reading an inspirational book or self-help writing book
• listening to motivational tapes
• reading a biography or watching a documentary about someone you admire (especially another writer)
• reading a current copy of The Writer or Writer’s Digest
• attending a writing conference, retreat or workshop

Think Ahead–Then Choose

We all feel anxious sometimes to the point of being stuck. That’s okay. Just be aware that there are activities that only pacify the fear (and waste your time)–but there are also enjoyable activities that can act as catalysts to get you writing. Choose the activity that is going to propel you forward, not help you stagnate even further.

We all have our favorite catalysts. Mine include reading inspirational writing books or writing articles I’ve saved over the years, Skyping with another author about writing issues, or watching a movie about authors (like Becoming Jane, Cross Creek, Finding Forrester, Finding Neverland, or Miss Potter).

What is your favorite pacifier–and what’s the effect on your writing? On the positive side, what is your most helpful catalyst and its effect on your writing? Please share some ideas that work best for you.

November 11, 2011

People often tell me that I’m very productive, so it was a shock recently to take a procrastination test and come out in the top 10% of procrastinators!

It said I scored 80 out of 100 possible points and “when it comes to putting things off, you often do so even though you know you shouldn’t… Though you are likely incredibly productive just before a deadline, you might not get all your work done and there is a lot of unwanted stress.”

Procrastination: Who, Me?

I wanted to mutter “stupid test,” but I was aware that certain bad writing habits (dare I call it procrastination?) were affecting the quality of my work. Oh, I got the writing done, but too often lately the quality was less than it could be because I delayed starting. I was submitting writing that was less than my best because it was hurried.

I think I had deluded myself into thinking there was no problem because I was busy all the time. I am never late with the educational writing, and usually early. I am never late for my M-W-F blogs or paid critiques. I don’t even procrastinate on writing nonfiction books. Just fiction. Just the “pulling words out of thin air and making up people and whole worlds” kind of writing.

Check Yourself Out

Why is getting started so hard? In a magazine article on procrastination in Children’s Writer, the following quote struck me as true–of me, anyway:

“In many cases, we procrastinate because we are anxious about the work at hand. It seems too difficult or onerous. ‘The hardest part of any task is the first five minutes. It’s like cold water. It’s just getting in that’s the hard part. Once you’re in, the water feels great,’ says Steel [a university professor who studies procrastination]. ‘Usually after procrastinating, once people finally get around to the task, they say, ‘I don’t know why I thought this would be so much worse than it was.’”

That struck me as true, so this week I’ve been starting my NaNoWriMo writing by setting a timer for just five minutes. Then I write furiously for five minutes, with permission to quit if I hate it at the end of five minutes. Have I stopped yet when the timer went off? No. I’m on a roll by then, and it wasn’t nearly as hard as I’d made it in my mind.

Why do we do this to ourselves over and over? It feels silly to have to “trick” my muse with a kitchen timer. But hey, it works, so I’ll probably keep doing it until I find something that works better!

What about you? What tricks do YOU use to get started?

November 2, 2011

Procrastination: the Movie? Yes…making a movie is one way to overcome the temptation to procrastinate and build good writing habits, day by day.

Yesterday, on the first day of NaNoWriMo, I had such good intentions. But my novel idea looked overwhelming to me (and rather stupid, I must also admit). I dinked around, trying to get started, until 3 p.m.!!! Major procrastination. I got a few other things done, but mostly I wasted precious writing time. I only got 635 words written, way short of the daily 1,667 words needed to meet the 50,000 word goal in November.

Then I remembered an old trick I once used to break other bad habits and decided to use it this morning to cure the procrastination temptation. (This works for all kinds of procrastination, from avoiding exercise to avoiding the keyboard.)

Make a Movie!

Being tempted to do any of the things we do to avoid writing (watch a movie, eat sweets, play on the Internet) deals with avoidance and some kind of instant gratification. We want to feel better about our procrastination and time wasting. When you “make a movie,” you move beyond the instant “feel good” aspect of your contemplated activity–and play the movie out to the end.

You don’t concentrate on how good you’ll feel if you stop and watch TV and eat half a gallon of ice cream. You play out the whole scenario. An hour or two later, how will you feel? After you waste the whole day, how will you feel? What will it cost you today, in terms of productivity and lost self-esteem? What will it mean in the long run if you do this all the time? (No career? Death from some obesity-related disease? No self-respect?)

Borrow This Template

When faced with a procrastination temptation, turn to this questionnaire (below) which I keep in a document template on my computer. I filled it out in detail this morning before writing almost 2,000 words (yippee!), and after I blog, I will probably fill out the questions again because “afternoon slump” is starting to set in. Feel free to copy this questionnaire to use. It’s a great technique for helping you look past the instant fun of procrastinating to what you can accomplish if you take the long view. Here’s the form to fill out:

Pause when facing any kind of temptation to procrastinate (by eating unhealthy food, or watching TV, or surfing the ‘Net, etc.) and fill in these answers in writing:

• I consistently struggle with the following bad habit:
• When I play the tape through to the logical conclusion, the end result of this habit makes me feel:
• and does the following to my self-respect:
• typically produces the following results in me:
• If left unchecked, the behavior will probably lead to the following long-term consequences:

ON THE OTHER HAND…

• If I play the other healthy tape all the way through to its logical conclusion and choose NOT to give in to my bad habit, I feel:
• and my self-respect is:
• typically produces the following results in me:
• If I keep away from this bad habit, I will benefit from the following long-term results:

Whatever temptation you’re facing right now, take a few minutes and make a movie. Follow your intended actions to their long-term consequences. Is it the life you want? If not, make another movie. In this movie, you resist temptation and make the right choices–consistently. Take time to linger over the final credits of this movie. If you want, it could be your life!

August 31, 2011

When re-reading Getting It Done by Andrew J. DuBrin, PH.D., I came to a section on dealing with procrastination. One suggestion is something I’d like your feedback on.

He said you can make progress with procrastination if you “compartmentalize spheres of life.” He says that if you have multiple demands on your time that seem overwhelming, “mentally wear the same blinders placed on horses so they can concentrate better on the race and not be distracted.”

Box It Up!

I would love to be able to do that on a regular basis! Are you able to compartmentalize? I agree with the author that procrastination is more tempting when multiple demands are swirling and competing in your mind.

I think that male writers have an advantage here. They seem able to put things in boxes, tape the lids shut, and then deal with one box at a time. (I know this for a fact because I can tell when I am being put in the “wife” box!)

Women, however, mix things up. Our concern for our child’s health or marriage problems or a sibling’s financial crisis “bleeds over” into our writing time. And we tend to feel guilty if we’re happily typing away while a member of our family is in trouble or needs us.

‘Fess Up

So…please share your wisdom with me. Men, if you can explain how to put things in boxes or make blinders work, please advise. Ladies, if you’ve figured out how to push aside your other concerns while you write, please share.

I bet we could all use some tips!

August 20, 2010

If a friend from your critique group told you ”I just can’t get started on my story today,” what would you say? “Get moving, you lazy do-nothing wannabe!” I hope not!

If your writing friend bemoans receiving another rejection, do you say, “Well, what did you expect? Your novel stinks!”?

I would hope not. Most of us are better friends than that…except to ourselves.

Your Own Best Friend

Listen to how you talk to yourself. When you procrastinate, do you beat yourself up? Do you call yourself names? And to paraphrase Dr. Phil, “How’s that working for you?” Does it spur you on to do your best writing–or to give up and eat a pint of ice cream?

When you receive a rejection, do you downgrade your writing? Do you tell yourself that publishing is just a pipe dream, that it’s for others but not for you?

Do you say things to yourself that you would NEVER say to a writer friend?

Time to STOP!

Learn to tell yourself the truth–but with kindness. Be a mirror that reflects back understanding. If you got off course, gently encourage yourself back on the writing path you want to travel.

Not:

• You’re so lazy that you’ll never get anything written and published.
• No editor or agent will ever read your novel, much less publish it!
• You only have friends on Facebook because they don’t really know you.

Say this instead:

• You may have trouble getting started because you’re afraid of something. Try journaling to get to the bottom of it.
• You may (or may not) find an editor who loves your novel–but you’ll never know if you don’t keep sending it out. Let’s try one more time.
• Many people in your real life know you and love you. Make a list. Be thankful for each person on the list.

Be That Good Friend

The next time you stall or hit a rough spot in your work, talk to yourself like a true friend would. Be kind, be understanding, give some praise, and encourage yourself to try again.

You can be your own best friend.

May 26, 2010

I’ve only been up and working for an hour this morning.

Already I’ve counted eleven different distractions or temptations that I’ve had to resist in order to keep working.

Here’s my one-hour list:

• new movie that came from Netflix
• new library book, a mystery by a favorite author
• email from friends
• Snapfish photos sent by a friend
• wanted to call my best friend to tell her something IMPORTANT
• magazine on the kitchen table in the pile of mail
• new SCBWI bulletin on my desk
• do the dishes (they bug me)
• run necessary errand to “get it out of the way”
• respond to Facebook messages from friends
• a helicopter flying in circles over my neighborhood

Some I gave into. (I ran to the window to see if the helicopter was the police in case there was a criminal in my front yard. It wasn’t and there wasn’t.) I read two emails from friends but resisted answering them yet. But it amazed me in just one hour how many distractions there were to deal with!

Similarities

My best friend (who lost 100 pounds several years ago) leads a support group for weight loss. She faces temptations daily to slip back into old habits. Food is pressed on her from TV, magazines, gifts from students, family gatherings, parties, graduation receptions, her husband, and more.

But she’s kept off the 100 pounds because she has a plan. She has plans for social situations, plans for quiet evenings, plans to avoid temptation in restaurants and grocery stores, and nice ways to say “no, thanks” when well-meaning people offer her food. She calls it “mindful eating.”

Writers would do well to have “mindful writing” as well. Your distractions are probably like mine in some ways, different in some ways. But writers, too, need a plan to avoid temptation to get off schedule. Choosing to write from nine to ten this morning is only a small part of the job. Having a plan for dealing with distractions is the crucial other part.

Needing a Break?

Maybe you’ve been writing and editing and researching for an hour or two, and you’re distracted by everything. If so, maybe you need a break. But I would advise copying my friend here too. When she wants to snack, she asks herself, “Am I really hungry?” If she’s not, she might take a short walk or read a book to rejuvenate herself.

Likewise, writers need to ask themselves, “Am I really tired now?” Have you worked long enough to justify being tired? Or are you frustrated or intimidated by your writing and looking for a distraction? If you’re not truly tired, maybe you need to make a better choice too. For example, you might read an article on dynamic dialogue if you’re having trouble in that area.

Mindful Choices

It’s true that you might be really tired and need a break. Take a tip from my friend. Before she makes a food choice, she pays attention to what she’s doing. She chooses something that will benefit her body, like a banana or yogurt (instead my #1 choice: chocolate candy!)

As writers, when we really do need a break, we also need to be mindful. Choose a small break that will benefit your writing. (I’ve listed seven such choices in “Need a Break? Make It Productive!”) Give it a time limit, and at the end of your ten or fifteen minutes, get back to work refreshed.

What are YOUR major distractions? Can you share a tip (or two) on how to handle them? Let’s pool our resources for our fellow writers!

May 19, 2010

A few weeks ago in “Find a Need and Fill It” I asked for your input concerning the topics you find most helpful in this blog.

Thank you all for the responses! It’s been very helpful. The requests fell into three main categories. Since I blog on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, that made it easy for me. From now on, this will be my general blogging schedule so that I can cover each topic area regularly.

What You Can Expect

Monday = Inner Motivation (includes:)

• fears–all kinds!
• discipline
• focus
• goals
• rejection
• lack of motivation
• encouragement
• a writer’s dream life
• procrastination
• working with our “inner editor”
• enjoying writing more
• perseverance
• creative inspiration
• writer’s block

Wednesday = Outer Challenges (includes:)

• setting boundaries
• time management
• distractions
• discipline
• writing schedules
• goal setting
• balancing writing with chaos in life
• balancing day jobs with writing
• our writing needs (vs. “their” needs)
• self-defeating behaviors

Friday = Tips ‘n’ Tricks of the Trade (includes:)

• specific genre help
• writing books I’ve found helpful
• blogs I find useful
• classes I’ve taken
• voice (writer’s and character’s)
• critique groups
• conferences
• working with publishers
• marketing–all kinds
• considering the audience when writing
• dealing with publishers who don’t respond
• finding good markets
• developing depth in writing
• selling “unique” pieces instead of jumping on the bandwagon

Thanks for Your Input

All your feedback has been immensely helpful in organizing future blog posts and making sure I cover topics you want to hear about and find useful. If I missed anything on these lists, feel free to let me know!

January 21, 2009

Do your writing first! Leave the dishes and your exercise routine and everything else–and just write. Haven’t we all heard that advice a hundred times?

I have–and I’m still no good at it. But from this point on, I will be!

Accountability, thy name is Donna!

In the online class I’m taking this month, we were encouraged to pair up with what is called a change coach. We hold each other accountable and encourage each other to pursue our goals. And we’re supposed to confront (nicely) when our partner isn’t keeping her commitment.

My change coach is Donna McDine, the middle-grade novel reviewer at the Writing for Children Center. A graduate of the Institute’s course, she also blogs at the “Write What Inspires You!” site. We noticed this week that while we both have great written goals, put in lots of hours, and truly LOVE to write–we weren’t getting much writing done on our own projects. (We wrote for others, critiqued, reviewed, taught, and blogged–but by the time we got around to our own books, we were too tired or it was evening and others needed us.)

Ready, Set, Go!

So, we made a deal, Donna and I. We have committed to writing first thing each morning on our own projects. I’m aiming for a minimum of an hour daily. If we can do more, great. But Monday through Friday, we’ve promised to spend time on our books first. When we’re done, we’ll email each other to say how long we wrote. It won’t take us long to send that email, but since I’ll know Donna is waiting for my report, I bet I get the writing done.

It’s on our schedule first now. And we’re planning ahead for success. We’re taking time before we quit each day to set up our desks with all the materials we’ll need to get started right away in the morning. One iron-clad rule we agreed on: absolutely NO Internet until the writing is done.

Do YOU write first thing each morning, before you get caught up in the day’s demands? If so, what are the tricks YOU use to make it work? We can use all the tips you have as we try to establish this new habit!

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