Writers First Aid

Lies in Disguise: Changing Your Beliefs to Destroy Writer’s Block

February 22, 2012

“But I don’t want to fail again.”

I’ve said it to myself often enough. Students over the years have said that to me countless times. That fear of failure often happens when it is time to set goals or start a new project.

“It is wise to make a plan,” says creativity coach, Eric Maisel, author of Coaching the Artist Within. “However, since we make so many resolutions and break them, set so many goals and fall short of realizing them, and create so many plans without following through on them, we become reluctant to plan. We prefer not to plan so as not to disappoint ourselves one more time.”

I’m at that point this week, looking at two novels I worked on last year that I simply couldn’t make “work.” I started them over several times, trying different angles, but no luck. I still like the ideas a lot, but I find myself leery of making one more stab at them. I’m afraid of wasting my writing time and having nothing to show for it. I’m more than leery. I’m stuck.

One of Maisel’s solutions is to make a simple plan. He says to leave out the complexities that just make things harder. His idea of a simple plan is: I will try to write every day. (No rules or details, no set number of pages, no word count, etc.) Or even better, I plan to write today. But is that enough? Not for me.

A Simple Plan

A simple plan is well and good, but getting started is still the hardest part (for me anyway) when facing a project where fear of failure is high. (It doesn’t have to be writing the Great American Novel either. It can simply be a project I’ve “failed” on before.)

We want to change an action here—get started and keep going. It’s often not as simple as “just do it!” though. We have to back up and change the fearful emotion that drives the writer’s block and procrastination. And to do that we have to back up and change the thought that creates the emotion.

Sometimes changing your thoughts is enough to get you going. But repeating “thoughts” or “affirmations” that some articles suggest (like “I am the country’s best writer, and agents are fighting to represent me”) are just absurd to me. My brain, anyway, kicks something like that right back out. I simply don’t believe it. If I did, I wouldn’t be stuck.

What’s the Answer?

We need to back up one additional step. Your automatic thoughts come from your beliefs about yourself as a writer. The beliefs need to change before you will think healthy thoughts, that flow into healthy writing emotions, and then produce good actions (writing). I think beliefs need to be true, though, for them to be of immediate use to you.

If you are believing a pack of lies (like “I’ll never write any better” and “You have to know someone in publishing to sell a novel”) then start with the lies you are believing and replace them with truth. One good source for this is another of Maisel’s books, Write Mind: 299 Things Writers Should Never Say to Themselves (and What They Should Say Instead).

The Process

Facing a blank page or facing a revision can cause fear. We may not know what to do, or we may know what needs to be done, yet fear that we don’t have the skill to pull it off. When facing something fearful, the thoughts that automatically spring forth have to do with what we believe about staying safe and getting our needs met.

As I look at the novels I want to tackle again this year, the automatic thoughts that spring to mind include: “I’ve already wasted months of writing time on these novels, so why waste more?” and “I need to be doing work-for-hire projects instead and make money during my writing time” and “I don’t want to spend months on something just to fail again” and “I’ll never get this novel done” and “This project is above my skill level, and I’ll never be that good.”

All those thoughts have to do with staying safe (I don’t want to fail again) and getting needs met (income from writing and feeling like the writing will matter.)

Writer’s Block Smashed: Replace Lies with Truth

Last week I made a long list of truths to replace my automatic thoughts (those “lies in disguise.”) Some of them are faith-based which wouldn’t maybe apply to everyone. But some of them apply to all writers. (I’ll list a few below.) Just the act of writing down these truths and re-reading them before my writing time in the morning is already changing my ability to tackle the first novel.

My fifty or so new truths include:

I can have my novel written in a year. (vs. “I’ll never get this novel done.”)
Writing is at the top of my To-Do list. (vs. “I’m too busy to write.”)
I learn to write better by writing, and daily if possible. (vs. “I’ll never be good enough to write this book.”)
Since I want to increase my output, I’m going to institute a new writing routine. (vs. “People make too many demands so I never have time to write.”)
I can write anywhere and under any conditions. (vs. “I can’t write unless I have hours of quiet time alone.”)
I don’t need to read another book on writing first—I need to write! (vs. “There must be a magic key out there, and I’ll keep buying writing books until I find it.”)

As I’ve said countless times here, and in both Writer’s First Aid and the new More Writer’s First Aid, we’re all in this together. Writers have always dealt with these issues. But instead of feeling the fear and inadequacy (and then buying a box of Krispie Kremes and turning on the TV), take the time to figure out what lies you are believing about your writing.

Replace them with truth—and see how that changes your emotions and subsequent action. You’ll write more. You’ll write better. You’ll enjoy your daily writing time. Publication will most likely eventually follow, but it will become less important than your daily experience of enjoying the writing.

Just for reference, here are the Eric Maisel books on my own writing shelf that I have found very helpful over the years:

Post tags: fears, writers block, writing anxiety

Posted in: fears,Uncategorized,writers block,writing anxiety | | Comments (10)

10 Comments »

An inspiring post, Kristi. Thank you!

Comment by Judy Dearborn Nill — February 22, 2012 @ 1:14 pm
Thanks, Judy! I get a little long-winded sometimes though.

Comment by Kristi Holl — February 22, 2012 @ 1:36 pm
Awesome article! I love all your advice and input.

Comment by Sharon — February 22, 2012 @ 2:03 pm
Sharon, thank you. If I could remember to practice everything I preach, I’d be ahead of the game. Thank you for commenting.

Comment by Kristi Holl — February 22, 2012 @ 3:38 pm
Kristi, I’ve asked many of the same questions and had the same automatic thoughts about some of the work I’ve done in the last year. I’m going to try replacing my automatic thoughts with truths. The one about reading just one more writing book struck home. I love reading writing how-tos and often reread them. Maybe I avoiding jumping into the murky sea of writing what seems hard by reading just one more good writing book. And I also find myself thinking that I better do WFH books because they are a sure thing. I like doing them, but there’s no reason not to write without a contract, too. Thanks for the good ideas.

Bonnie

Comment by Bonnie Hinman — February 22, 2012 @ 3:50 pm
Bonnie, this is one of those issues that I didn’t think would be an issue this far along in my writing career. Instead, it is even MORE of an issue. Partly, as you know too, it’s about earning money with WFH and nonfiction writing, which seems easier to sell (to me anyway) than single title fiction.

Yes, the reading one MORE how-to book is my way of looking productive, learning (which I love to do), and yet not writing. I used to study two hours and maybe write one hour. Now I am trying to flip it–write two hours for every hour I read a how-to book–and write them first!

Comment by Kristi Holl — February 22, 2012 @ 7:43 pm
Thanks, Kristi, for this great post. I spend a lot of time yesterday thinking about my next steps with a couple of projects. My fears and frustrations were scarily similar to yours. I’m a busy freelancer and college teacher, but at heart I want to keep writing fiction. I had to find a way to take some of the fear away and also find a way to get around what I call “long project syndrome.” Reading your tips today have reinforced the decisions I made (& the truths I found) and offered some great steps for moving forward. And, actually, the how-to book that’s beside my chair right now is Writer’s First Aid!

Comment by Heather Wright — February 23, 2012 @ 11:07 am
Heather, you’re so welcome. I think one of the nicest things about writing this blog has been finding out that so many other writers deal with EXACTLY the same things as I do. I no longer feel all alone (or even weird) anymore! I think “long project syndrome” is an excellent name for this, by the way!

Comment by Kristi Holl — February 23, 2012 @ 5:52 pm
Oh, I can relate to that one you mentioned – I’ve already wasted a year on this novel and I don’t think I can bear to fail and waste time again!
The hardest thing for me is regaining the passion for the story. If it already feels as though the story wasn’t “good enough” or my writing wasn’t, the passion eludes me.
But I have also learned from experience that writing begets writing (as you said), and more writing begets better writing. We just have to write ourselves back into what we loved about the story. Thinking and procrastinating never does it!

Comment by Sherryl — February 27, 2012 @ 1:51 am
What a lot of wisdom there, Sherryl. Yes, regaining the passion for the story is the tough part when on a “re-do.” So often I’m not too thrilled with some of the plot–or most of it even–but still love the characters or the setting or SOMETHING SPECIAL about the idea. And you’re right–only writing begets more (and better) writing. Thinking about it–or blogging about it!–doesn’t do the trick.

Comment by Kristi Holl — February 28, 2012 @ 12:48 pm