February 28, 2011

First of all, thanks for all the terrific book recommendations. I have compiled the list and plan to read through them! To thank you properly, I’m going to recommend one of my favorite books to you.

I realized over the weekend that there was a fourth benefit to being sick for ten days. Since I was too contagious to leave the house the first week, I read through my favorite books on writing. I own a lot of writing books, and I underline heavily, so mostly I re-read my underlined parts.

Sounds Heavenly

One book captivated me (again), and I re-read it cover to cover (slowly). Let me quote the first few lines of the introduction, and you’ll see why:

“How to stay limber, how to make the writing not grim, how to enjoy writing. How to make room in real life for a writing life. These are my goals. Are they yours, too?

I want my readers to be able to set up a positive, happy, easy writing life. One that is fun. I believe you can (and fairly quickly) create a writing life where the writing process itself is so enchanting and delicious, you want to write. You go to the desk willingly, stresslessly. In my dream vision for your writing life, you don’t have to make yourself write. It’s not work. It’s not tedious or punishing. It’s what you do.”

Doesn’t that sound like a heavenly writing life? The quote is from a 2005 book by Heather Sellers called Page after Page. It’s food for your writing soul.

February 25, 2011

Being sick for ten days recently taught me some lessons.

1) I’m too busy. It’s no wonder I have trouble getting any writing done, much less enjoying it. I’ve noticed for months that I was having a lot of trouble settling down and actually doing my daily writing. I was great at telling other people how to do it, but not good at it myself. So when I was extremely ill–but still getting more writing done than usual–it got my attention. Why was that?

It was because I was running a fever and couldn’t see people or I would spread the plague. Each morning I’d stand in the bathroom, shivering, and take my temperature. If it was over 101, the solution was simple: cancel all meetings I had that day. Most days I cancelled more than one meeting or appointment. In ten days, I cancelled ten things. Two things I really minded (babysitting my grandkids). Eight things I didn’t mind much at all. (And truthfully, five of the things I was thrilled to get out of.)

After being home a week, I realized how lovely it was to be home. I didn’t enjoy being sick, but I loved being able to stay put. And just from being home more, I wrote more. Usually just fifteen or twenty minutes at a time out of sheer boredom, but it all added up. And a lot faster than my “well” days when I pushed myself to write.

The result? I resigned from an office that requires about six or seven hours per month and two meetings per month. I plan to back out of a few more things when my terms are up.

2) The second lesson I learned when sick was that I’m online too much. I had sort of realized this for a long time, and had a goal of not getting online until noon because email and Facebook and surfing ate up too much time. But when sick, I just wanted to be curled up on the couch with the heating pad, blankets, cough drops, and a book. (I don’t have a wireless laptop, thank goodness, so that wasn’t an option.)

After ten days of only being online maybe an hour every other day to attend to editor email and post a blog, I realized how much more I was enjoying my days–even sick! I’m not even sure why, but I find being online too much quite agitating. I don’t read or watch things that are disturbing, so it’s rather a mystery to me, but I definitely notice it.

I’m feeling much better now, but yesterday I deliberately stayed offline because I didn’t need to blog, and I wrote and read and took my book outside and sat in the swing (which I hadn’t done in months) and noticed things (cardinals, daffodils coming up, lawn furniture needing scrubbing). I got the reading done that I needed to do for a class, but it was calming.

3) The third lesson I learned while sick is that I don’t read enough good books. I read a lot of articles online, or books that don’t challenge me but are entertaining before I drop off to sleep. But good books? Challenging books? They’re hard to find.

When my fever dropped after a week or so, I headed to the library for some new books. I had been re-reading classics on my shelf which I loved, but I was ready to concentrate on something new. I brought home six brand new books–I was the first to check them out.

I only ended up reading one of them all the way through, and it was only so-so. The others-many by bestselling authors–I only made it through about fifteen pages. Apparently the trend now in adult books is to switch viewpoints every two or three pages (one book had seven viewpoints in fifteen pages), and it was like being jerked around on a badly edited movie screen. I couldn’t keep track of the characters, so when they got murdered or whatever, who cared?

Leave a Suggestion

If you’ve read a fiction book for adults in recent years that really grabbed you, leave a comment, okay? I love recommendations. In recent years I’ve enjoyed books like The Help, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society, Folly Beach, and The Secret Life of Bees. Good gripping character stories-do you know any like that? Part of the life of a writer is feeding your mind with good writing.

February 23, 2011

When my children were small–and even as they grew older–I struggled to find a writing schedule that worked most days of the week. After much trial and error, I would hit upon a schedule that allowed me to write nearly two hours per day. Bliss!

Not For Long

That “bliss” lasted a very short time usually–until I once again had morning sickness, or someone was teething, or my husband switched to working nights, or someone started school, or someone else went out for three extra-curricular activities and we lived in the car after school and weekends.

It was many years before I realized there is no one right way to schedule my writing. The “right way” (by my own definition) is simply the schedule that allows me to get some writing done on a regular basis.

[For the five types of parent-writing schedules, read the rest of the article. This is an excerpt from More Writer's First Aid.] 

February 21, 2011

(Bear with me–today is nothing but shameless self-promotion! The Table of Contents with sample chapters is at the bottom.)

If you liked

          

 

     then you’ll love

                                                        e-book!

 

You won’t actually find bandages or medicine in More Writer’s First Aid. But in 48 short chapters, you will find cures for dealing with disappointment and jealousy, writing despite physical and emotional pain, banishing procrastination once and for all, and combining writing with parenting (from infancy to adulthood.) “We’re all in this together” has been Kristi’s constant reminder to readers of her first book and her blog. (Read sample chapters below in the Contents.)

 

Kristi has had nearly 40 books published in 30 years of writing, taught writing for the Institute of Children’s Literature for more than 25 years, and has guided, mentored and taught hundreds of aspiring writers (both as an instructor and blogger for more than 55,000 subscribers.) “I started writing on an Iowa farm, very isolated, with no Internet and no other writers around,” Kristi says. “It’s not about how talented you are–and it’s not who you know–that gets you published. Most often the published writers are simply those writers who refused to quit. I can help you persevere until you publish.”

 

In addition to the uplifting encouragement you found in Kristi’s first book for writers, More Writer’s First Aid e-book includes:

 

• eight more articles (48 versus 40) to inspire you [See Contents below]
• a new “family matters” section on combining writing with parenting children from birth to adulthood
• advice on current time management issues like e-mail and information overload
• portability for today’s modern reader–keep it handy on your computer’s desktop
• live links within the chapters leading to referenced books, classes, websites, and authors

 

 

Only $12.95 (pdf)   requires Adobe Acrobat

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE (immediate direct download)    

 

  Kindle also available. (Enjoy Kindle on your Mac, PC, iPhone, iPad, Android and Blackberry with Kindle’s free apps.)

 

 

 

Only $12.95 (pdf)   requires Adobe Acrobat

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE (immediate direct download)    

 

  Kindle also available. (Enjoy Kindle on your Mac, PC, iPhone, iPad, Android and Blackberry with Kindle’s free apps.)

 

 

 

Contents

 

I  ENJOYING THE WRITING LIFE—EVERY DAY! 

What Kind of Boss Are You?                                         

Honoring the Writing Process                                         

Dealing with Disappointment                                          

Striving for Contentment                                             

Breaking the Procrastination Cycle                              

How Tight Is Your Bow?                                           

Joining a Work in Progress                                        

Writing through Physical Pain                                   

Mentors or Tormentors?                                           

Mindful or Multi-Tasker?                                          

Perfectionist Writers                                                

Misplaced Dreams                                                  

 

II WRITING HABITS THAT HELP YOU

Change: Making It Stick                                          

“Not” To Do List                                                

Counting the Cost                                                 

Focus: the Power of Scheduling                            

Getting the Writing Done                                      

Undo It Yourself                                                  

Timing is Everything                                             

E-mail: the Hidden Enemy                                     

Finding Time: Pruning before Prioritizing              

Procrastination: Have You Tried An Unschedule? 

The Power of Writing Things Down                      

Course Corrections                                             

 

III A WRITER’S EMOTIONS

Write What You Love                                          

Facing Your Creative Fears                                          

Writer Imaging                                                    

Silent Sabotage                                                   

Stages of Writing                                                

Sorting Out the Voices                                        

Conquering the Green-Eyed Monster                   

Give Up Your Perpetual Maybe                           

Writing through the Storms of Life                      

Dealing with Rejections and Setbacks                  

Writing after Major Losses                                  

Get Your Fear Shot!                                           

 

IV FAMILY MATTERS

Set Boundaries to Write More                            

Creativity and Noise: Do They Mix?                    

Hats Off to Mom Writers                                   

Household Have-to’s                                        

Writers: Always Working                                   

Busy—or Crazy Busy?                                      

A Parent’s Writing Schedule                             

Writing through Relationship Struggles               

Combining Babies, Bylines and School-Age Children

Writing during the Teen and Early Adult Years          

Running on Parallel Tracks                                       

Cherish the Commonplace                                        

February 18, 2011

(Due to the flu hanging on, this is another repeat from several years ago. It’s long–but I think you’ll find it helpful. I had forgotten that there could be so many causes for writer’s block–and so many different cures!)

*************

A Rose Is a Rose Is a Rose . . .
If you’ve been writing any length of time at all, you’ve experienced writer’s block. You may have read articles about it, following different authors’ recommendations to blast through your block. Did the solution you tried do the trick? If not, the reason could be that you applied the wrong answer to your problem.

Aspirin or Band-Aid?
If you go to a physician, he doesn’t doctor you with a one-medicine-fits-all or one-treatment-fits-all solution. Instead, there are specific treatments for specific ailments: the broken arm gets a cast, the cut gets stitched, the infection gets an antibiotic. Only when you identify the specific ailment can the right treatment be given, or a cure found. The same is true for writer’s block.

A Multitude of Sources
Reading an article on writer’s block might help you if you happen to stumble across a suggestion that truly corresponds to your problem. But 27 years of writing and 22 years of teaching the craft of writing have led me to believe that there is no single type of writer’s block.

If you can’t identify the origin of your block, treating it is impossible. Have you stopped writing because you can’t face any more rejection slips, or your spouse (or a parent) is/was overly critical, or you’re disillusioned with having to shape your writing for the market? Are you blocked because you eat or drink too much, sleep too late, or are just plain exhausted from trying to combine writing with earning a living for your family?

Possible Causes of Writer’s Block
1. Critical childhood voices: those voices from the past that tell you you’re not good enough, you’re not creative, you’re untalented, or lazy. They might have originated with parents, grandparents, caretakers, teachers, or siblings. While you may no longer hear actual voices in your head, you’ve incorporated their views of you somewhere along the way, and they crop up at the worst times for your writing. The resulting feelings of anger and self-doubt produce confusion, sap your motivation, and make you wonder if you should just throw in the towel.

2. Personality style: passive or aggressive, outgoing or shy, rigid or flexible, courageous or fearful. An outgoing person may be great a book signings and marketing his work, yet block when it’s time to sit down–alone–and write for three hours. The flexible person may have numerous ideas that flow effortlessly and may be able to juggle a number of different projects, yet he may block when it’s time to choose just one idea and get to work. The insecure person may write fluently and happily alone, yet block when nearing the end of her story because she’s too afraid of rejection to submit a finished product.

3. Self-criticism: harsh and self-punishing judgments on our work and marketing efforts. Even when our self-criticism is well founded and accurate, it can defeat and block us before we get started. Self-esteem plummets, courage fails, and we shut off the computer and head for the refrigerator. We’re afraid we’re deluding ourselves both about the viability of the project we’re working on and about our ability to pull it off. This can certainly stop our writing in its tracks.

4. Marketplace blues: delays and rejections. After a few months or years of nothing but rejection slips, it can become harder and harder to keep pouring your heart into your work. Sometimes, after numerous near misses and “almost” sales, writers can come to mistrust editors, agents, even the writers in their critique group, wondering if they have hidden agendas. After being rejected enough, the writer may feel unable to face another editorial comment, bad review, or misplaced manuscript, not to mention payment that never arrives and stories that never get scheduled for publication. It’s not surprising if he’s blocked.

5. Regular life: finding time and energy to write while attending to the ongoing demands of life. All the pressures we human beings face–family and financial needs, inner compulsions, leaky faucets, illnesses, difficult bosses–make us feel sometimes that we can’t have both a writing life and a regular life, one that includes time for play as well as work. When we’re busy writing, we feel guilty about neglecting friends and other interests; yet when we’re playing or socializing, we can feel guilty for not writing. This inner push/pull can eventually cause us to block.

6. Fatigue: physically worn out. Each step in the creative process requires energy. If you’re working a day job to put food on the table, coaching soccer on the weekend, and hosting a dinner party for a friend’s anniversary, there may simply be no energy left. You may still want to write, truly want to, but be blocked because for the moment your tank is running on empty.

7. Environmental blocks: too much noise and chaos in your surroundings. Writers who can’t write at home–who swear they’re totally blocked–have been able to write easily and prolifically when transported to a cabin in the mountains or an isolated seaside retreat. Why? They were removed from the noise of city streets, roommates’ stereos, toddlers crying, other people’s phones, or whatever was keeping them too distracted and on edge to write. Freed from the noise and chaos, surrounded by peace and quiet, these blocked writers often find they’re not blocked at all.

8. Information-specific blocks: when you can’t answer or solve a particular question in your writing. Perhaps it’s your first mystery novel, a private eye whodunit. You realize you don’t know how it should differ from a police procedural, nor are you sure of the legal limits on a private eye’s operations. Or perhaps the 12-year-old hero of your children’s book aspires to be an Eagle Scout someday and you don’t know just what activities that will entail. You’re blocked because you lack specific knowledge. These types of blocks can be taken care of easily, as soon as you identify what it is you need to know.

9. Skill deficiency block: when you don’t have the practical skill needed to proceed with your work. Perhaps you’re blocked in finishing your biography of the first African-American astronaut because you don’t know how to acquire permission for the photos you’d like to use. Or maybe you’ve planned to take your own photos for an article about a local nature reserve; you have the writing all done, yet you’re blocked from finishing because you realize you don’t really know enough about cameras and lighting and film speeds. These are practical skills you need to acquire before you can unblock.

10. Anxiety and/or depression blocks: nerves, doubts, worries, fears, and panic. This may be the first sign of any kind of block, and the foremost symptom to deal with. Sometimes our worries are realistic. Can we afford to spend time writing stories that might never sell? On the other hand, if we sell a book, will our insecure partner sulk or even walk away? If we write that “coming-of-age” novel, will our parents or siblings recognize themselves in our work and be upset or angry? Anxiety can produce a restless energy that keeps us from being able to sit still long enough to write. On the other hand, depression can leave us too lethargic to get up off the couch and make it to the desk.

A Tailor-Made Solution
Different blocks require different solutions. A few days of peace at a seaside cottage wouldn’t help the blocked writer who didn’t know how private eyes operate–but it could work wonders for the parent of twins. Taking an assertiveness training/confidence building course won’t help the weary postal worker moonlighting to write a historical novel–but it could work miracles for the shy, retiring writer with a drawer full of manuscripts he’s afraid to s
ubmit.

So take the time to get to know yourself. If you’re blocked, find out why. Then outline and implement a step-by-step plan for blasting through your block. Read excellent books on the subject, like If You Can Talk, You Can Write by Joel Saltzman, Bird by Bird by Anne Lamont, Deep Writing by Eric Maisel, and The Courage to Write by Ralph Keyes. Help is available if you want to break through your personal blocks and create the writing life of your dreams.

(excerpt from Writer’s First Aid by Kristi Holl, 2003)

February 16, 2011

I’m down with the flu (fever, coughing) and feel rotten, so I’m going to repeat something from a year ago that seems appropriate to me today! I should be back in the swing of things by Friday. *************************************************

“Life is what happens when you’ve made other plans.” We’ve all heard that saying. I want to remind you that it’s during these unexpected “life happens” events that you most often lose sight of your writing dreams.

How do we keep that from happening?

According to Kelly Stone in Time to Write, “The only requirement to be a writer is a Burning Desire to Write, coupled with the dedication that that desire naturally creates. Follow that desire up with action and nothing will keep you from success.”

Life Interrupted

I agree with Ms. Stone. Adhere to that formula for success, and you can’t miss. BUT life gets in the way sometimes: personal illness, job loss in the family, sick parents or children, a teen in trouble, a marriage in trouble. It’s at these times when you need to take precautions to keep your dream alive inside you.

Other writers struggle with this too, whether it’s during calm times in life or when there’s more upheaval. “It’s easy to believe that what you do doesn’t matter, but you have to think that it does matter,” says novelist Mary Jo Putney, “that you have stories to tell, and a right to tell them.  You should take the time to yourself to explore this ability. You’ll always be sorry if you don’t do it.”

Practical Tips

There are many tried-and-true actions to take to keep your dream alive. Write out your goals and action plan, breaking it down into small, do-able steps. Set small daily goals, and write–even if it’s only for ten minutes–to stay in the habit. Visualize in great detail having pieces published, autographing your first novel, or quitting your day job to write full-time.

You don’t have time for all that?

Okay, then just do ONE thing. Steve Berry, NY Times bestselling author, said it well: “The number one thing you must do is write. You have to write, write, write, and when you can’t write anymore, write some more.”

Don’t go to bed tonight until you’ve spent at least ten or fifteen minutes writing. Nothing keeps a writer’s dream alive and flourishing like sitting down and writing. Absolutely nothing.

February 14, 2011

For the last two weeks, I’ve bombarded you with long posts on how to make changes in your writing life–and make them last.

A Breather

Today I’ll give you a breather and show you some of the treasures I found.

• Feeling overwhelmed as a writer? Read Jordan Rosenfeld’s  How to Talk Yourself Off the Ledge of Creative Despair and you’ll feel better!
• Back-to-Work Blues for Writers: Solutions is for writers who also work outside the home–and some practical realities and help in carving out that crucial time to feel like a “real writer” again.
• Ever wonder about Launching a Virtual Book Tour? For some great tips, read both Part 1 and Part 2.
• And don’t overlook this gem about The Missing Link–NaNoEdMo. This writer needs a month of enthusiasm generated about editing the rambling novel from NaNoWriMo. Guess what? There IS such a month. See NaNoEdMo and sign up for editing your novel in March. Just two weeks away!

Sit back and enjoy!

February 11, 2011

(First read The Dynamics of Change, Stage 1: Making Up Your Mind, Stage 2: Committing to Change, and Stage 3: Taking Action)

You’re well on your way to achieving your major goal at this point, and you’ve probably begun several new good writing habits to support your future writing career. This is great!

You don’t want to be a quick flash that’s here today and gone tomorrow though. You want the changes to last. You want to continue to grow as a writer and build your career. But…you know yourself. The good writing habits never seem to last.

Until now.

Change and Maintain

In order to keep going and growing as a writer, you need to do two things:

• Learn to recover from setbacks
• Get mentally tough for the long haul

First let’s talk about setbacks. They come in all shapes and sizes for writers. They can be mechanical (computer gets fried), emotional (a scathing review of your new book), or mental (burn-out from an accident, divorce, or unexpected big expense). Setbacks do just what they sound like: set you back.

However, too often (without a plan), we allow a simple setback to become a permanent writer’s block or stall. Setbacks are simply lapses in our upward spiral, or small break in our new successful routine, a momentary interruption on the way to our writing goal.

Pre-emptive Strike

Warning: without tools in place to move beyond the setbacks, they can settle in permanently instead. Use setbacks as a signal that you need to get back to basics. Setbacks–or lapses–sometimes occur for no other reason than we’ve dropped our new routines. (We stopped writing before getting online, we stopped taking reward breaks and pushed on to exhaustion, we stopped sending new queries each week…)

Count each day of progress, and don’t be so hard on yourself. I used to make myself “start over” when trying to form a new habit, and it was more discouraging than helpful. For example, if my goal was to journal every morning, I’d count the days. Maybe I managed it five days in a row. Five! I felt successful! But if I missed Day 6 for any reason, I had to start over the next day at Day #1.

A Better Way

I don’t do that anymore. It doesn’t help. Now, if my goal is to develop a new habit, I still keep track, but I keep going after a lapse or setback instead of starting over. So if I were trying to develop a journaling habit, and journaled five days and then missed a day, I would begin again on Day #6.

I would count all successful days in a month, which motivates me to try to reach an even higher total number the next month. This works with words and pages written and other new writing habits you want to start.

Coping Plans

In order to recover from setbacks, think ahead. Ask yourself what types of things might cause you to go off course or lapse in your goal efforts. Prepare ways to cope ahead of time and have your plans in place. (Sometimes that’s as simple as always traveling with a “writing bag” of paper, pens, a chapter to work on, a craft book to read, etc. so that you can always work, no matter what the delays.)

Coping plans have this basic structure (according to Neil Fiore’s Awaken Your Strongest Self):

“When __________ [potential distraction] occurs, I will say ______________ [inner dialogue] and I will do _______________ [corrective action].”

When my best friend calls to talk during my writing time, I will say to myself, I’m working and need to call her back at lunch time and I will let the answering machine pick up.

When company comes for a week, I will say to myself, It’s fine for me to take one hour each day to write, and I will close the door to my office (or bedroom) and write before breakfast for one hour.

Retrain Your Brain

Mental toughness–grit to persevere–is the other ingredient you’ll need if you want to maintain the changes you’ve made in your writing habits. Scientific studies have clearly shown that repeated affirmations and mental rehearsals create new neural pathways in the brain making success easier and eventually permanent.

Speaking daily affirmations aloud has been proven to help you “retrain your brain” into healthier lines of thinking. Make the affirmations to deal specifically with your own writing issues. For example:

• I am equal to any writing challenge.
• I love to write, and I never miss a day of writing!
• I get started with ease and keep going smoothly and fluidly.
• I take breaks every 90 minutes or so, using the break to refresh.
• I use visualizations of successful writing times to help build new habits and patterns.
• I love to study and then apply what I learn to developing my writing gift.
• My writing gift is unique and the expression of that gift is unique.
• I don’t need to be like any other writer.
• I never give up on my dreams.

I encourage you to make your own list of positive affirmations pertaining to any area of your life where you’d like to see change. (And yes, I use them myself, broken down into several categories: spiritual life, health, writing, children/grandchildren, and my marriage.) I guess I have a lot of areas where I want to rewire brain patterns!

Use the affirmations to help you make changes–and then cement those changes in place. It’s time we stopped yo-yoing up and down and created stable, permanent writing habits.

February 9, 2011

(First read The Dynamics of Change, Stage 1: Making Up Your Mind, and Stage 2: Committing to Change.)

Ready for Stage 3? It’s about taking action.  If you’ve done your homework in Stages 1 and 2, you’re probably more excited about this action phase than you would normally be.

Why? You’re prepared. You’re motivated. You’ve taken obstacles into account already.

You’re primed for success.

Action Steps

As mentioned before, this stage includes several big steps:

• You must decide when, where and how to start.
• You must show up to start despite fears and self-doubts.
• You must focus on each (present) step, rather than focusing on the end (future) goal.

This is the exciting stage because you’re past making excuses and procrastinating and giving in to the fear of change. You’re done rehearsing and experimenting. It’s now time to take action. You take steps on the path that leads to your goal. Note that shift in focus. The daily path is now more important than the end goal. So find ways to make each successful step enjoyable.

Create Action Plans

An action plan is exactly what it sounds like–a written plan to take concrete action steps to perform a behavior that leads to accomplishing your end goal. An action plan involves when you will do something, where you will do it, and how you will do it.

Run this when-where-how scenario through your mind for each step of your action plan. Be detailed. It doesn’t have to take a long time, but this mental rehearsal is immensely helpful. The more detailed the mental rehearsal, the higher the probability that you will actually initiate the behavior.

To help you create action plans, ask yourself these questions:

• When do you want to start working on your goal? (day and time)
• Where will you start? (time and place)
• What specific action step will you take at this time?
• How will you keep this commitment?

Time to Show Up

Fear and self-doubt can raise their ugly heads when you least expect it. Even when you’re primed and eager to start, fear and anxiety can give you pause.

There are many ways to deal with fears and self-doubts. How you choose to deal with them is probably an individual thing. Here are some of the ways we’ve discussed dealing with fears.

1. What’s Holding You Back?
2. Pitch It To Yourself!
3. Voices of Self-Sabotage

I also keep several books on my shelf such Ralph Keyes’ two books on fear (The Courage to Write and The Writer’s Book of Hope) and The Now Habit by Neil Fiore on conquering procrastination.

Focus on the Present Step

Focusing on your end goal as motivation to get started causes two problems. First, the end goal (e.g. finish a novel) can just look overwhelming. You want to quit before you start!

The solution? “Focus on what you can do rather than what is out of your control,” says Neil Fiore of Awaken Your Strongest Self. “Switch from thoughts about the goal, which is in the future and is usually overwhelming, to thoughts about what you can do in the present.”

Second, the reward is so far in the future that we feel tired just thinking about waiting that long. A reward many months in the future isn’t much motivation to stick with the writing today.

One solution is making sure you have rewards lined up for every 15- or 30-minute block of time you work on your goal. Publishing a book a year from now won’t get me writing today, but a reward of watching a favorite movie today if I write ten new pages is much more likely to get my fingers to the keyboard.

Small Steps

Take small steps. Reward yourself (with something healthy) for every step you take in direction of your goal. Be your own cheerleader. Each small step will get you warmed up and moving, then help you build momentum.

NOTE: Don’t stop here. On Friday we’ll discuss the final stage–learning to recover from setbacks and maintain momentum.

February 7, 2011

(First read The Dynamics of Change and Stage 1: Making Up Your Mind)

Okay, we’re ready for Stage 2: Committing to Change. This is not taking action yet. Instead, this stage involves:

1. 1) Planning the necessary steps
2. 2) Building up your motivation
3. 3) Considering possible distractions and/or discouraging things that might cause a setback

The change you make at this point is to shift from “passively wishing to achieve your goal to actively committing to make it happen.” (Neil Fiore in Awaken Your Strongest Self.) If you did the work in Stage 1 (thinking through the risks and benefits, plus evaluating your personal abilities), you should have fairly realistic expectations of what does–and doesn’t–work for you at your particular stage of life.

Time to Experiment

Before you plan the necessary steps to succeed in making permanent changes as a writer, you’ll want to take time to experiment in small ways. See what you like and don’t like. See what works for you–and what doesn’t.

• Try writing for 15 minutes upon awakening or right after your morning coffee.
• Stay offline until 10:00 a.m. for three days.
• Try writing at the library during two lunch hours this week.
• Read a writing blog before you get on Facebook or Twitter.

Record your thoughts and feelings when you introduce these writing changes. How do you feel? What works and what doesn’t? You can’t fail at this stage. You are only gathering information.

Some of these changes you’ll love and find so easy! Others you won’t find helpful at all. But as you succeed with certain writing changes (writing 15 minutes each evening while supper cooks, reading 5 pages per day of a writing book), your motivation will rise. You’ll feel more like a writer automatically.

Mental Rehearsals

During this stage you also need to think through strategies for dealing with obstacles, distractions and setbacks. One of the most effective (and fun!) ways to do this is using what athletes call “mental rehearsals.” They imagine how they’ll handle challenges at each step along the way.

Envisioning how you will handle writing distractions (toddlers wanting to be entertained, friends calling to chat, school vacations) and setbacks (an editor rejects your novel after two revisions, computer crashes) helps you build stamina or mental toughness.

Use mental movies to confront each setback or distraction. Instead of your usual reaction (chocolate, TV, surfing the ‘Net), clearly envision yourself sitting tight, working methodically through your writing problem, piling up a stack of new pages, and keeping to your deadline with ease.

Not all interruptions and distractions happen to us. Be aware that you often seek out distractions as well. In order to escape writing blocks or manuscripts that just aren’t working well, we often attempt to escape the anxiety or boredom or agitation by looking for distractions.

Are You Ready?

The final part of Stage 2 is actually committing to the change. Take time to think and journal about the strength of your commitment. If you want to succeed–and make the success permanent–it needs to be more than a wish. It needs to be a strong intention.

So, what do you intend to do? What change(s) in your writing life do you intend to make? Now is the time to commit.

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