April 30, 2010

My daughter’s expecting her first baby, and it’s fun watching her during this “nesting” season. Today it struck me how much her preparations for a new life are like those plans made by writers who want to write for a lifetime.

Time to Make Changes

My daughter’s changes have included preparing the baby’s room and getting the proper baby equipment. She is also handing over a ministry at church that she runs (and loves), but feels she can’t devote enough time to after the baby is born. And she can stop working if she chooses to; she said they’d been budgeting for this eventuality for years. (Bless her husband.)

All this nesting has been a dual venture. Her husband is involved, from going to doctors’ appointments and setting up the nursery to being a careful financial planner. They’re on the same team.

Writing Season Preparation

If you want to be successful at your writing and even turn it into a career, you’ll need to make similar changes. The easiest one is setting up a writing space (whether it’s a spare room or just a corner of the bedroom) and acquiring the proper equipment (computer, printer, Internet access).

You may have to give up some volunteer activities for a while, or cut back (or cut out) certain hobbies. For a while, maybe you can’t plant huge gardens or run marathons or belong to three book clubs. Your may also hope to quit your day job. If that’s the case, you’ll need to do like my son-in-law and have a strict budget (probably for years) to prepare for the income cut.

Lastly, involve your family. Writers’ lives always run smoother when the immediate family members are on the same team. Find ways to involve everyone so they don’t feel neglected.

It’s Temporary

My daughter’s nesting season won’t last forever. One day when she’s an old hand at the skills she’ll acquire to balance home and baby, she will (slowly, I hope) begin to add some “extras” back into her life. Maybe not everything, but some things she misses the most.

Likewise, the things you give up so you have time to devote to your writing is for a season. Once you have the writing skills well in hand, you will be able to slowly add back into your life a few of the things you miss most. But give sufficient time to your “writing season” first. You’ll be glad you did!

6 Comments »

1. 

   Krisit, I started writing when I was pregnant with my second child, and your post brought back all those wonderful memories. Of course, once the baby was born, I didn’t write for many months as sleep became more important …

   Congratulations to your daughter and her husband, and of course you!

   Comment by Vijaya — April 30, 2010 @ 1:50 pm

2. 

   Vijaya, thanks for the comment. I started the ICL course ten days after my second daughter was born and started off writing during afternoon naps. It was an exciting time all around! And you’re right–sleep has to take priority for a while!

   Comment by Kristi Holl — April 30, 2010 @ 2:49 pm

3. 

   Congratulations to your family!
   What an interesting analogy! I’ll add something else – when I was expecting my son, I was *compulsive* with the nesting. I feel that way sometimes now, too, with writing – I’m obligated to, say, make dinner, or go get him from school, and all I want to do is keep working on my project! So I sacrifice sleep. It’s a compulsion, the same as the one that made me dust Venetian blinds at midnight!

   Comment by Yvette — April 30, 2010 @ 9:24 pm

4. 

   Yvette, I was the same way that you mentioned–compulsive with the nesting. And I had the most creative ideas! That first baby nursery was my favorite remodeling job–but it was done on so little money, you wouldn’t believe it. (Probably for less than one item kids buy today at BabiesRUs.) I got very creative ideas at the oddest times of day or night–just like I did (and sometimes still do) to revise stories. Yes, writing a book is much like growing a baby! And getting it published is much like giving birth–painful but worth it.

   Comment by Kristi Holl — May 2, 2010 @ 6:20 am

5. 

   Babies and writing are both exciting times. My baby is learning to get around – and somehow she always finds the little bits that her older siblings leave on the floor. I am constantly digging out of her mouth that which should not be there…kind of like revision isn’t it? Take away that which doesn’t belong to keep it strong and alive
   Congrats on the happy anticipation of the next family member!!

   Comment by Andrea — May 3, 2010 @ 9:23 am

6. 

   Andrea, thanks for your post. I had to laugh at your analogy of revision and pulling foreign objects out of your daughter’s mouth. You nailed it!

   Comment by Kristi Holl — May 3, 2010 @ 5:17 pm

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